Is Negativity Bias Running Your Life?

Posted November 6, 2018

In Life Management, Managing Priorities, Relationship Building

Did you know that there is a psychological phenomenon by which humans react to bad things in life more strongly and persistently than to the good? It’s called negativity bias. Its origin harkens back to the caveman days when potential danger lurked behind every bush. Is negativity bias running your life? If so, I have good news for you. You can overcome your negativity bias and rewire your brain to focus more on the good instead of on the bad.

There are many ways in which the negativity bias manifests itself. Here are a few examples:

We remember criticism much more readily than we remember praise.
Negative experiences stick in our memory longer and more vividly than positive ones.
When your mind wanders, it’s more likely to recall something which made you anxious, angry or upset, instead of recalling something that made you feel happy.

“Positive thinking will let you do everything better than negative thinking will.” –Zig Ziglar

With all of the negative political ads we’ve been bombarded with over the past several months, it’s easy to get sucked into a negativity bias. I’ve found that the best way to make a shift is to consciously choose to focus on possibilities and opportunities rather than fear and negative outcomes. In other words, focus on what you want, not on what you don’t want.

Remember that today — November 6 — is Election Day in the US. If you don’t like something, quit complaining and go vote!

Negativity bias is part of our evolutionary pattern. It helped our ancestors to stay alive. Thousands of years ago, it was more important for survival to escape negative or dangerous situations than it was to approach opportunity.

In our modern world, having a negativity bias is no longer necessary for our survival. However, since this primitive fear is still built into your genetic code, negativity bias can create a serious drag on the quality of your life if you are not aware of it. Fortunately, with a conscious effort, there are ways to manage negativity bias. Instead of focusing on fear and danger, shift your focus to opportunities and possibilities. You’ll be amazed at what a difference this shift in focus will make on your overall happiness and success.

10 Strategies to Improve Your Quality of Life

Recognizing your negative mindset is the first step toward change. Having an awareness of your negativity bias can help you to think through a situation and choose a different response. You are the only one who can choose your thoughts, so why not choose a positive mindset and positive thoughts.

For every negative thing you say or do, concentrate on saying or doing at least five positive things.For example, if you say something critical to someone you work with, make a point of saying or doing five positive things that will help you to develop and maintain a more positive relationship with that individual. In a marriage, it takes at least five good acts to repair the damage of one critical or destructive act.

Play a daily game with yourself, called the Happy-Healthy-Wealthy Game. At the end of the day, create an intention for tomorrow to do at least one thing that will make you feel happy, one thing that will make you healthy, and one thing that will make you wealthy (however you define wealth). Commit to honoring these intentions tomorrow, even if nothing else gets done. If you want to increase the impact of playing this game, share your intentions via text or email with an accountability partner. At the end of each day report “done” or “not done” for today’s intentions, and also share your intentions for the following day. Repeat this daily. Doing this exercise will help you live a more balanced life and will also help you to consciously choose to do something daily that makes you feel happy.

Identify some positive things you can concentrate on when you catch yourself thinking negatively. These could be inspiring quotes or affirmations, a poem that uplifts you, lyrics to a song that makes you feel happy, or a positive memory or story you’ve written down so that you can read it to yourself during a low point. Tap into these positive things whenever you find your mind wandering to the negative side. As Willie Nelson says, “Once you replace negative thoughts with positive thoughts, you’ll start having positive results.”

Collect “warm fuzzies.” Every time you get an email, Facebook post, card or letter from someone thanking you for something that you did or acknowledging you for a job well done, store it in your “warm fuzzies” file. When you catch yourself focusing on negative thoughts about yourself, open the file and read what’s in there to reaffirm how wonderful you are.

Fear of failure or fear of what someone else might think often convinces us to let go of our deepest desires. Fear is a form of negative bias. If fear is holding you back, be aware of its negative impact. I wrote an article, Is Fear Running Your Life?, which offers tips for overcoming fear.

Keep a Worry Log. Before bed, write down your greatest fears and worries and date your log entry. After you have done this for 30 days, start reviewing your Worry Log, beginning with what you wrote 30 days ago. Continue to do this nightly. As you review each entry from what you wrote a month ago, you will discover that most of the things you were worried about never came to pass.

Keep a Gratitude Journal. Take a few minutes each night before bed to write down all of the good things that happened to you throughout the day. Within a few weeks, this will help train your brain to focus on the positive things that happen to you. By focusing on what you are grateful for, you’ll be rewiring your brain for happiness.

Your perception of reality is what creates YOUR reality. The key to changing your reality is to practice realistic optimism by shifting your focus. Here’s an interesting exercise that exemplifies the power of focus:

(1) Tell someone your life story or a life experience as if it were a tragedy, emphasizing all the terrible aspects of that experience.

(2) Now, tell the same story as an uplifting and delightful experience, focusing on all of the positive aspects of that same experience, without denying the facts.

Notice how your perception of the same story changes by shifting your focus.

Begin each day by sending a message of gratitude to someone you care about. This could be a high school coach who had a huge positive influence on your life years ago; an employee at the hardware store who provided you with exceptional service; or, the barista who greets you with a smile and an uplifting thought every time you stop by the coffee stand for your favorite beverage. I’ve been doing this daily gratitude practice for 13 years and it sets the tone for the rest of my day. This one particular practice has transformed my life.

Begin today by lifting someone up.

Who needs a little kindness and encouragement? Send them a card or a message of encouragement or appreciation right now!

Lyrics to a song I wrote years ago guide my live today. Listen to Your Heart is very much my message to friends, family, and clients – and is the core principle around which my work as a Life Architect is aligned.

If you’re ready to shift your focus and rewrite some old negative scripts, I can help! Let’s schedule a no-cost, no-pressure Discovery Call today.