Overwhelmed! That's a word I've heard a lot lately. As we approach the holiday season, that theme rings as loud as the Salvation Army bells.

A client recently exclaimed, “Who has the time to focus on one thing at a time these days? That's a luxury I just cannot afford!” In an effort to be more efficient, most of us have learned how to multitask.

Computers are known for their ability to multitask. For example, you can compose a letter while scanning for viruses or downloading a software update. But have you noticed that even computers are often not as efficient when multitasking? The functions slow way down when too many resources are being called upon at one time. Our brains are even more susceptible to loss of productivity when we try to do two or more things at once – especially if they are complex or require a high degree of concentration. Studies show a drop in efficiency of 30-50% on individual tasks performed while multitasking.

Perhaps one of the worst forms of multitasking is when we're trying to spend “quality” time with a loved one, while also trying to be “productive.” I'll never forget an experience I had years ago when I went to my daughter's soccer game on a day that I was feeling overwhelmed and behind. I had grabbed the mail on the way out the door. In my attempt to be efficient with my time, I was sorting through the mail while watching the game. Unfortunately, I was looking down when my daughter made her only goal of the game. I felt terrible when someone said, “Did you see that? Your daughter just made a goal!”   Although she never knew, it was one of those moments I could never get back. (I could have read the mail anytime.)

Now my daughter is 17 years old, and I realize that two years from now she will be away at college. I constantly ask myself, “What do I choose to focus on right now?” If I say yes to an opportunity to work with an out-of-town client, I will be saying no to spending that time with her ... time that is becoming more precious by the moment. One of the reasons that I became a certified teleclasses instructor was because I enjoy working with clients from all over the globe, and this enables me to provide services without having to travel.

I love to multitask when quality is not compromised with either task. For example, I enjoy reading, listening to a CD, or watching TV while on the treadmill. I used to do a lot of needlepoint – something I could easily do while visiting with a friend or watching TV. However, one time I tried to do counted cross-stitch, and I discovered that it required too much concentration to combine with anything else and do it right...which explains why I hate doing counted cross-stitch!

To multitask or NOT to multitask...that is the question!
Ask yourself these two questions as you consciously choose which tasks to multitask and which to be solo focused on:

1. Will I compromise quality or productivity by multitasking? Am I proficient enough with these tasks that I can handle both at the same time without compromising quality or efficiency with either of them?
   
   
2. Will someone else feel dishonored if I multitask while I am spending time with them? Given that we're human beings, not human doings...how am I being while I am doing something else? Am I sending a message that I don't intend to convey to someone else when I choose to multitask rather than being fully present with them?

I am writing this article while on an airplane, so you could say that I am multitasking (flying and writing at the same time). This worked well for me until a few minutes ago when the flight attendant got on the intercom to give a commercial about the airline's frequent flyer program. Even though I am already a Mileage Plus member and had no interest in listening, the speaker was right over my ears and I could not concentrate on writing this article while she was speaking. I chose to take a break and come back to my writing when the flight attendant was finished talking. Now it's quiet again and I can continue...

Toxic Success vs. Sweet Success

Paul Pearsall, author of Toxic Success: How to Stop Striving and Start Thriving, defines two kinds of success. He says that toxic success "leaves you and those who live and work with you feeling constantly pressured, overwhelmed, and with too little time to share the enjoyment of the simple but profound things in life. Toxic success is a state we 'pursue,' a goal we seem pushed to work for."

Pearsall defines sweet success as "being able to pay full and undivided attention to what matters most in our life. It results in a state of consistent and adaptive satisfaction and delight with one's blend of love, work, and play. Rather than being consumed by earning a living, it results in feeling totally alive, finding joy with someone else in the good life in the present."

If only we could set aside the constant distractions caused by the pressure to do, have, and be more. Millions of us are too busy and too self-absorbed to realize that we already have the success we so desperately seek. Sweet success is about living fully in the moment and recognizing that enough is enough!  Being technically proficient in your business or profession will only get you so far, especially if you destroy your most important relationships in the process of achieving that proficiency.

Pearsall has also written another excellent book, The Heart's Code, Tapping the Wisdom and Power of our Heart Energy. In this book, he offers a Heart Energy Amplitude Recognition Test (H*E*A*R*T*) on page 30-31, which I took and was surprised at how high my score was. (I was painfully honest in answering the questions.  A high score is not considered to be good.)

Reduce the overwhelm -- narrow your focus to three intentions at a time!
Are you living your life on purpose? Is your self-talk full of "I have-to," "I should," "I gotta," "I can't," or "I wish"? How often do you say "I choose to..."?

Maybe it's time to quit shoulding on yourself and be at choice! You're eventually headed for a crash landing if you do not honor your values and your life purpose by consciously choosing what you want and being intentional with your behavior and responses. And auto pilot may not be set to get you where you want to go.

Begin by jotting down some intentions. When you set your intentions, choose ones that you're willing to put your time and energy behind and that are most important to YOU. Keep them short and simple. When you look back over the list, does it represent what matters most to you at this time in your life?

Here are some examples:

• I intend to lose 10 pounds.
• I intend feel more rested and energetic when I wake up each morning.
• I intend to take one full 24-hour day away from work each week (including e-mail).
• I intend to leave my office by 6:00 PM each day.
• I intend to give 10% of my earnings to charity.
• I intend to save 10% of my earnings for retirement.
• I intend to spend time on the kind of work that is most meaningful to me and say no to the work that does not fit my mission.
• I intend to deepen my relationship with my spouse.
• I intend to feel more connected to my kids.

Because your brain can only focus on so much at one time, I suggest that you identify no more than three goals or habits to work on over the next three months. Jot down your three most important goals or areas of focus, and then underneath each goal write a description of the results you intend to achieve. Remember... trying to concentrate on more than three primary goals at a time can put your mind into overload.

Set goals for the next three months. You've already stated your intentions. Now get REALLY specific by identifying measurable goals to help you follow through with your intentions. (Hint: Notice that my examples are not all about work.)

Receive support as you change behaviors...
In order to create new behaviors which will get and keep you at the enhanced level at which you wish to function, you may need support.

An accountability partner or personal coach can help you...
... reflect back what you say you want so you can hear yourself.
... clarify what it will take to get you from where you are to where you want to be.
... build in accountability check-ins (without judgment) around the actions you choose to take.

Identify whatever support you need in order to reach the goals you've identified, and then ask for whatever help you need. If you'd like to experience the power of coaching, contact me at kathy@orgcoach.net to request a complimentary coaching call.