Published by Kathy Paauw
Organizing & Productivity Consultant
Certified Life Coach
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December,
2000
Issue 9 |
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The
Buffet Syndrome: Too Much on Your Plate!
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Over
the summer my family went on a 7-day cruise. If you've ever been
on one, you know that the focal point of most cruise vacations is
FOOD -- available in large quantities 24 hours a day. If you don't
get enough to eat at the three sit-down multi-course meals, you
get another chance at the midnight buffet . or you can order 24-hour
room service! I recently learned that the average weight gain on
a 7-day cruise is 8 pounds! Although I only gained half of that,
I have slowly and steadily gained a few pounds each year over the
last decade. Needless to say, I am not happy with the trend, and
I've taken steps to reverse this.
Life is like a buffet line -- so many choices, and yet there's only
so much room to fit it all in. We know that we can only eat so much
before we create health and self-image problems for ourselves. We
know the importance of maintaining a proper balance of vitamins,
minerals, proteins, carbs, fats, chocolate (yes, this is an essential
food group for me!), fiber, etc.
Isn't it the same with activities and responsibilities? If we take
on too much, we create health and self-image problems for ourselves,
too. If we don't maintain a proper balance of activities to nurture
our physical, mental, spiritual, and social needs, we create stress,
disharmony, and eventually dysfunction in our lives. Many of us
-- myself included -- have not mastered the fine art of saying NO!
As an organizing consultant, I get calls every week from individuals
who suffer from stress, disharmony, and sometimes dysfunction. People
call me asking for assistance getting organized. I often ask, "What
will getting organized do for you?" These are some of the replies
I hear:
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If I didn't waste so much time looking for things, I could focus on things that are really important that I just don't have time for now.
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I could make more money if I had more time to _____ (follow up with prospects, stay in touch with clients, etc.)
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I'd pay my bills on time and could avoid late payment fees.
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I'd have more time to relax and do things I enjoy.
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My______ (spouse/SO, kids, boss, employees, etc.) would be happier if I had more time to ____.
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I'd have more time to deal with important things requiring my attention and follow-up.
Although a good filing
system and tickler file will help
my clients find things quickly and remember important follow-up, there is no organizational
system in the world that will fully address
the most common concern that I hear from nearly every person who calls
me -- not enough time.
We all have 168 hours a week. You say that's not enough? What if you
could wave a magic time wand and add an extra day to each week -- for
a total of 192 hours a week. Would that be enough? I'll bet not! It's
the buffet syndrome! No matter how much time we're given, we pack more
in than we can manage. What happens in a buffet line? Whether we get
a smaller plate or a larger plate, most of us will fill it to the rim
at an all-you-can-eat buffet!
Well, I'm committed to shedding some of the pounds I have gained over
the last decade. I've tried multiple diets, and most of them have not
worked ... and I know why. It has to do with willpower and choice. When
a two-pound box of See's chocolates is available, I can easily finish
it off in a few days. (Okay, I'm a confessed chocoholic!) I've found
the key to losing weight is in limiting the choices and the portions
on my plate (big revelation!), so I've limited my portions by purchasing
prepared meals through Jenny Craig. (I've lost 10 pounds so far!) No
counting calories, thinking about balancing my diet, or measuring my
food. I get to eat what's there - even chocolate cake -- although it's
a small piece.
Just as it serves us to limit our food choices and portions to what
our bodies need, it also serves us to limit the number of activities
and kinds of responsibilities we take on. Stephen Covey, author of The
Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, asks: "What does it matter
how much we do if what we're doing isn't what matters most?"
Having more time does not address the challenge of staying focused.
Here are some tips to help keep you focused on what matters most.
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Five
tips to help you avoid the Buffet Syndrome
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1. Get clear
about what is most important to you.
- In Cheryl Richardson's book, Take Time for Your Life, she suggests that we create an "Absolute Yes" list. Identify what is on your Absolute Yes list by noting essential activities and relationships that will support your happiness and well-being.
- Take some time out this month to assess the Year 2000 and identfy what's most important to you for the Year 2001. List the five most important people, activities, or focus areas in your life that need your attention in the coming year. Everything else becomes secondary.
2. Concentrate on your strengths and your passions.
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According to Donald Clifton, author of Soar With Your Strengths, people are most successful when they're matched with activities they love to do and are good at. A Stanford University study of 250,000 people concluded that high intelligence didn't guarantee high accomplishment. Hard work and enthusiasm in the field of choice was the leading indicator of success.
- Pick one strength to pursue at a time. Excellence is a product of hard work and being passionate about what you do. Adjust your goals to target your strengths and passions.
- Ignore weaknesses that will not hinder you. Work on a problem only if it lessens your productivity. Let your strengths overpower your weaknesses. (Imagine the world-class athletes at the Olympics -- the gymnasts aren't concerned about being great swimmers!)
3. Put your own needs first. (It's not selfish -- really!)
- It's important to remember that when we put the needs of our business or company before our own personal needs, we put ourselves at risk. When we neglect our health, well-being, and our relationships, we become less effective professionally.
- Remember the instructions given on an airplane before takeoff: "In the unlikely event that the cabin were to lose pressure, we ask that you put on your own oxygen mask before assisting others." Why? Because if you don't take care of yourself first, you may not be available to assist others!
4. Let some of the balls you're juggling intentionally drop.
- In order to do this, you may need to deal with the source of the symptoms that cause you to over-commit yourself. Do any of these fit for you?
- Trying to please everyone
- Trying
to be liked by everyone
- Trying to be the star or the savior (what would they do without you!)
- Trying to do everything perfectly
- Trying to say yes to everything and everyone
- Addiction to the emotional "high" of running on adrenaline in crisis situations
- Feeling not at choice -- like there's no one else to do it
- After you've identified the source of the symptom of being over-committed, take at least one action step each week to help you consciously drop some of the balls you choose not to juggle anymore. For example, if you're a perfectionist, ask yourself if perfection is required or if it truly serves you to strive for perfection. The vast majority of the gold medallists in the Olympics don't get a perfect score. Unless you're a rocket scientist working on a space shuttle, perfection probably isn't required.
5. Check your
self-talk.
- Be on guard for "should" or "gotta" or "have to." Replace these words with "choose to."
- You are in the driver's seat for your life. If you don't choose to do something, don't do it!
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Year-End
Self-Reflection: What will be on your plate in 2001?
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Schedule some time
for a day retreat by yourself to reflect on your successes and disappointments
for the Year 2000, as well as your wishes and intentions for the Year
2001. Write down your responses to these questions as you reflect:
1. What worked?
What moved you forward toward success?
2 .What didn't work? What got in the way or discouraged you from moving
forward with your intentions?
3. What learnings did you gain from this year that you choose to apply
in the coming year?
4. What do you want? What's on your Absolute Yes list for the coming
year?
5. List the five most important people, activities, or focus areas in
your life that need your attention in the coming year.
Tom Brokaw
reported a couple years ago that the top three New Year's resolutions
for Americans were to lose weight, save money, and get organized. Many
people repeat these kinds of goals from year to year and experience
little or no success in between. Simply stating what you want does not
make it so! Achieving goals requires intention, planning, and
action! Rather than creating an unachievable long list of goals
for the year 2001, start with a shorter list that is realistic but challenging.
Remember the old cliche...Rome wasn't built in a day!
The SMART
process is a good way to plan for success with any intention or resolution.
As you identify what you want for the coming year, make goals or choices
that are:
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Specific
- Have a crystal clear picture of the desired outcome. |
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Measurable
- How will you know you have achieved your desired outcome? How
will you measure it? |
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Achievable - Create a step-by-step
plan to accomplish what you want. |
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Relevant
- Does this goal fit within the bigger picture of what is most important
to you? What will this do for you? |
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Time-bound
- What is the timeline for accomplishing what you want?
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Settle for More -- Hire a Coach!
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Once you have clarified your specific, measurable goals and built
in a timeline for achieving them, consider building in some support
for yourself by hiring a Life Coach. These are some of the benefits
you will experience in working with a coach:
- Clarify your priorities
- Review of what
is working and what is not so you can make adjustments
- Create weekly action
plans to keep you "on purpose" and moving forward with intention
- Hear yourself think
(through reflective listening) and gain clarity about what you want
- Get encouragement
and support when you feel discouraged
- Sort out your options
when you feel stuck or not at choice
- Brainstorm and
bounce ideas off of someone who is not attached to the outcome
- Build in accountability,
without judgment, for following through with your intentions
My connections with
the coaching community provide me with knowledge about areas of expertise
held by many trained coaches. If my coaching style or areas of expertise
are not a good fit for you, I can provide names of other certified coaches
for you to talk with. Click here
to request a complimentary no-obligation coaching session.
GIFT
CERTIFICATES NOW AVAILABLE!
Do you have
a friend, colleague, or loved one who would benefit from working
with an Organizing Consultant or Certified Business/Personal Coach?
I offer gift certificates that can be redeemed for products and
services. Visit my Company
Store for some ideas, or contact me at kathy@orgcoach.net
to ask about special package prices for combined products and
services. Mention that you read this newsletter and you'll
get a 10% discount on each gift certificate you purchase between
now and the end of the year.
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This
article is by Kathy Paauw of Paauwerfully Organized.
Kathy's web site is a comprehensive resource
devoted to helping busy professionals and small
business owners de-clutter their schedules, spaces,
and minds so they can focus on what's most important. Kathy
is an organizing & productivity consultant,
certified business & personal coach, and
speaker. Contact her here.
For free resources and valuable productivity
tools visit http://www.orgcoach.net . |
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