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by Kathy Paauw Organizing & Productivity Consultant Certified Personal & Professional Coach |
Paauwer
Tools is a Monthly Ezine January, 2002 Issue 23 |
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“Many
persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes Recent news stories have reported on the kinds of New Year's resolutions being made in the aftermath of the September 11 tragedies. For many, priorities have changed. As Los Angeles Lakers basketball guard Kobe Bryant recently said, “I’ve learned that you can’t take things for granted. You know how we always say, ‘See you later’? One thing I’ve realized from September 11 is that you can’t ever say that for sure. Things change in the blink of an eye. People go to work and don’t come back. One minute they’re living and the next minute they’re not…You try to learn from what happened. You can’t be consumed by it. You can’t live by it. All you can do is just live.” The fast-paced life of working ourselves to the bone so we can "have" more doesn't carry nearly as much appeal as it used to. Most of us have more than we need. Yet some are impoverished when it comes to living satisfying and fulfilling lives, or having healthy and meaningful relationships. It’s startling to realize that 75% of the world’s population does not have adequate food, shelter, and clothing. Viewing what you have in this context, you may be considered wealthy by some standards. If you have a bank account, you are considered to be in the top 8% of the world’s wealthiest. I live in the Seattle area, where Boeing announced its plans to lay off as many as 30,000 employees by the end of 2002. This announcement came just ten days before Christmas. Although being laid off may seem devastating when it happens, sometimes it is a blessing in disguise. I am not making light of how painful it can be to lose a job and be without steady income; I am simply suggesting that there may be a silver lining in every cloud. Helen Keller once said, “When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.” One of my clients has chosen to receive the news of his recent layoff as a gift. He’s treasuring the extra time with his family over the holidays. His layoff has also given him time to reflect about future career possibilities, given that he did not feel satisfied or fulfilled in his previous work. Last year another one of my clients (I’ll call him Bob) was laid off from his job, and his former company hired me to do some career coaching with him. During the initial coaching call Bob and I discussed the angst he felt about his career. He had enough severance pay to cover expenses for the next few months, but he needed to find work soon in order to support his family. Although being “let go” was a blow to his self-esteem, Bob confessed that he was relieved to be laid off from a job he had grown to dislike. But when I asked him what kind of work he was looking for, Bob told me he was seeking the same type of work that he had been doing. He had resigned himself to return to the “known” even though he didn’t enjoy it. I asked Bob, “What makes your heart sing?” He proceeded to tell me about two things that he loved doing. One involved some volunteer work he was committed to, and the other was related to a serious hobby that he had become very good at. I asked Bob if he had ever considered turning either of these passions into career opportunities. And that’s what he ended up doing! Last time I talked with him, Bob’s voice rang with enthusiasm as he told me about the new job he had created for himself. He’s fulfilling a need that he had identified within the non-profit organization where he volunteered so much of his time. Bob is doing what he loves most, AND he’s getting paid for it!
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Go
for the goal!
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“You
may get skinned knees and elbows, Sticking with the known may be the “safe” choice. However, our desire to be “safe” sometimes paralyzes our ability to exercise our free will. From childhood on, most of us have been programmed to play it safe, and this often affects the career choices we make as adults. We forfeit our freedom of choice through our own thought processes. I frequently hear my clients say, "I have to…" or "I should…" And when I hear those phrases I often ask, "Do you have to or do you choose to?" There are very few things in life that we have to do. Yet some of us forfeit our choice to the point of seeing our options in life as limited. I know this from personal experience. For 13 years I stayed in a stressful career that I did not find fulfilling. Not only was I unhappy, but the quality of my time with family suffered, as well. The more time I invested in that career path, the less at choice I felt. At one point I took an exam to receive a special certification in my field. When I passed the exam and was certified, I felt like there was no turning back! I told myself, "I can't leave this field now…look how much I've invested in it!" And besides, I had no idea what else I could possibly do. Fear held me back, until one day the pain of not making a change outweighed the fear of the unknown. In the midst of experiencing all of this pain I was laid off, which forced me to think about my choices. I felt like a baby bird being pushed out of the nest …and I learned to fly! Within a couple of years, my business was born. I’ve never looked back with a single regret. This anonymous quote just arrived in my mailbox: “Life is not measured by the breath we take but by the moments that take our breath away.” Does your life work take your breath away? I am struck by how many people live for the weekends because they dislike their work so much. If you can relate to this, imagine how it would feel to have the kind of work that you were so passionate about that you woke up before your alarm went off and you couldn’t wait to get to work! If you have a job you hate, face the fact and get out! Life is too precious to spend it doing something you don’t enjoy. Loving your work makes all the difference!
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Do
what you love and the money will follow.
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“Your biggest competitor
is your own view of your future.” A number of my clients are happy with their overall career choice. By renegotiating some responsibilities or delegating certain tasks to others, they’ve made their current work situations even more satisfying and fulfilling. If you are experiencing low satisfaction with your present job but you like the work itself, it’s important to determine what’s at the root of your dissatisfaction and what adjustments would make it more enjoyable. For example, is your dissatisfaction due to a negative supervisor?…a difficult co-worker?…an unhealthy corporate culture? Perhaps you want more time for family, friends, and hobbies. If you are working for an employer that does not honor these values and expects you to work overtime on a regular basis, perhaps it’s time to explore other places of employment that would more closely align with your values. If you are self-employed and you are unhappy with something, you have the power to make some immediate changes in the way you do business. Most important to remember is that whether you work for someone else or for yourself, you are not a victim. You have choice! If you don’t find your present work to be enjoyable and satisfying, make some changes. In America, as well as in a number of other countries, we are blessed with so many opportunities and choices. Although some of my clients enjoy working in their professions, others do not feel fulfilled by their current career track. By the time people reach their 30s and 40s, many are in search of more meaningful work…not just a job that pays well or has an impressive title. Some have asked me, “How do I figure out the best career move for me?” Whether you are considering
a complete career change or making some adjustments within your current
career path, I suggest that you begin by identifying three key ingredients:
When passion, talent,
and skills intersect, that’s when we operate at peak performance and feel
the greatest sense of satisfaction and contribution. You’ll find your
greatest personal power when you do work that taps into all of these. Click here for
a tool to assist you. I’ve
also found a few other key ingredients for achieving success:
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Defining
Success for Yourself
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"All our dreams
can come true if we have the courage to pursue them. What would it take to make your life more fulfilling? Given that you spend so many of your waking hours at work, devoting a day to think about the way you make your living can make a huge difference in your overall happiness and fulfillment. No matter how much time we spend worrying about our work, we don’t tend to spend nearly as much time thinking about our careers in a focused and meaningful way. Success or failure is often determined on the drawing board. Here’s a technique that may be helpful in identifying what your ideal career looks like: Write your dreams in a journal. Do this daily, and over time you will see some common themes emerge. Write in the present tense, as though the dreams about your ideal career have already come true. For example, I could write: "My work feels like play. I feel passionate, happy and fulfilled when I am working. I set my own hours and am able to take time off when I choose to. I am valued and appreciated. I easily attract the kinds of clients I most enjoy working with. I make a difference in the quality of my clients’ lives." If you are having trouble with this, try
journaling around these statements, finishing the sentences as many
times as you can:
One of my clients
had always admired a “successful” vice president in his company, who
took a 20-minute nap in the middle of every afternoon. As my client
began to define what success looked like for him, he completed the above
sentence like this: “I will feel successful when I can take an afternoon
nap in my own private office.” This statement represented two wishes:
(1) having a private office, and (2) having freedom and flexibility
with his own schedule. Once my client earned his own private office,
he blocked out time in his afternoon schedule for a daily nap.
When you aren't sure what your ideal career path looks like, it's important to focus first on who you are rather than what you do. Click here for a ready-made Career Marketing Survey that you can give to people you know from your personal and professional life. Invite responses from people you have known for a short while, as well as people who have known you for a lifetime. Their responses will serve as a mirror for you, which may be helpful in making good career decisions. Visualizing exactly what you want will help make opportunities present themselves. This is an inside-out model, rather than the outside-in model that most people follow. This will help you find that vital connection to your passion and purpose. Passion is that force that makes you want to get up in the morning. Purpose is the reason -- beyond making money -- that compels you to succeed. After you have a
greater sense of who you are, imagine yourself in the midst of your
ideal workday and describe your ideal career in these terms:
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Practical
Considerations
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“So
never lose an opportunity of urging a practical beginning, As you gain clarity
about possible career paths, do your research. Here are some practical
questions to address:
Abraham Lincoln once
said, “Nothing in this world is impossible to a willing heart.” I challenge
you to take the first step: dare to imagine your ideal life, and then
take the next step to begin making it happen!
My offer still stands to provide coaching services at no charge to any victims of the terrorist attacks. Victims include family members of those who were injured or killed, those who witnessed this horrific event, as well as rescue workers, police officers, firefighters, etc. The road to healing is a long one, and I stand ready to do whatever I can to assist in the process. If you or someone you know feels a need to talk with a certified professional coach -- someone who is trained to listen and provide support -- please invite them to contact me. Our
web site has received the
Internet Clinic Award, based on the following criteria:
Get my FREE
Organizational Assessment tool. Executives,
CEOs, and Managers: Declutter your environment by donating items you no longer need -- an old computer, cell phone, children's shoes and coats, clothing and household items, or even a car -- and get a valuable tax deduction in the process. Click here for more information. Our Mission I help individuals committed to moving their lives forward in powerful ways by decluttering their schedules, spaces, and minds. Table
of Contents for Past Issues
Copyright © 2002 Kathy Paauw, All Rights Reserved. | ||||||||
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